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When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bike. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way, so I stole one an...
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Bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods. And the bear turns to the rabbit and says, "Excuse me, do you have problems with s...
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I was on a date with a gorgeous woman. She said, "You're so funny. It feels so good to laugh. I haven't been able to laugh ...
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"I swear, the other day I bought a packet of peanuts, and on the packet it said "may contain nuts." Well, fucking YES! That...
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